My Dream Camera – what would yours be?

Posted by on Sep 5, 2013


I’m getting on a bit. I grew up with my hands deep in dev and selenium, playing with Tri-X and Seagull, and watching Bladerunner on TV.
A film in which you could take a picture, view it on screen, zoom in, enhance it and print it.
Pure science fiction, unimaginably cool, and just a few years away from being a reality. It made me think of how I dreamt back then of a camera where you could flick from colour to black and white on a whim, zoom from 24 to 300, change your ISO at will, have a 1000 frame roll of film in the back, produce polaroids on request the second you shot, and be able to blow your negs up to billboard size without shooting on 10×8. It was a silly and unattainable dream, obviously.
My dream then was closer than I ever imagined, the whole process completely re-invented, revolutionized. So that got me thinking, what would my dream be today? How foolish could my dreams be now? How long will it be till my new dream camera becomes a reality, an affordable reality even.
And what would your dream camera be? Come on, you can have anything you could possibly imagine. What would it be, what I have left out, not yet imagined or got horribly wrong?
This is my dream camera – leave a comment to let us know yours.

• Sturdy waterproof positive buoyancy body under 500g.
• Burst rate of 25fps for up to 3 seconds.
• 100gb SDC and reader that wirelessly (at 500g/p/s) automatically backs up to a secure mirrored server cloud somewhere under the Antarctic.
• Noiseless ISO 50 – 200,000.
• Resolution of 250mb.
• Variable HD video capture up to 250fps.
• Iridium battery, or something strange but fairly green, with a 2 month life (for location work) and a working temperature range of -65 to 140.
• In-built time lapse system, shutter speeds from 12h to 1/500,000.
• Completely silent operation.
• Image stabilization, whilst retaining superb sharpness, down to 2 seconds.
• Autofocus controlled by optional eye movement with NO time lag.
• Lenscapless fully self-cleaning system.
• Auto hooded Glassless lens* f1-22 14mm-1000mm sharp corner to corner at all focal lengths and apertures with no chromatic aberration or image loss.
• Self-loading internal filtration system to hold ‘virtual’ ND.s, grads etc – plus the ability to add your own mask to an image by drawing on the screen with a special pen.
• Idiot proof no set up wireless operation from any device.
• Fits in your pocket, so you can forget about it.

*glassless lenses are actually being researched as we speak. 10yrs? Less?)

Some of them are stupid, some not so far away. But back in the 80’s everything I wished for in a camera was stupid, and yet it happened.

So what do you think is going to happen to our tools? I hate all the kit, it irritates the heck out of me and constantly tries to get between me and the picture. One camera, one what we currently call lens, nothing else needed. Every job, whatever the brief, can be done with one tool in your hand and loads of freedom in your head. Heaven.


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